Joanne Suarez

What you pretend not to know Joanne Suarez

People like to wear masks all the time, and I'm not talking about the masks we're wearing now due to the pandemic. I'm talking about the masks we put on when we are interacting with others. We hide who we really are and we transform into a different person depending on the setting. We put on a mask when we meet relatives, we put on a mask at our work, and we put on a mask on when we are with friends (most of them). And the only time we are not wearing a mask is when we are alone. Not all of us do it in the same degree, and there are different reasons for doing it. But the most common is that we are afraid of being criticized and judged. So we look for acceptance in others and we conform. We are not sure of what our real selves will be like, so we become what we think will be liked more. If we are introverts, we change a bit to seem more extravert. If we are weird, we become more "normal" to fit in. We hide what makes us unique and authentic because we are not sure others will like it. And many times we are being rewarded for it. People seem to approve of this new, upgraded version of you, so you keep the small change. Then people expect you to behave like that, so you have to keep the facade. And then you add a bit more, and a bit more, until you are different enough to exhaust yourself by playing this role. I believe this is the main reason some people exhaust themselves in social settings. The mask needs energy to stay in place. This is not the same as being casual and carefree with friends, and more formal and careful at work settings. This is normal. In this book, you will learn how to hide part of your personality based on the premise of approval. Stop pretending to be someone you are not. It is ok to be yourself. The only one that needs to accept you is YOU!Peace & Love