Aisha T Oliver

I Used To Know Her Aisha T Oliver

The old Iesha had to die in order for the new Aisha to live. As a black woman I was taught directly and indirectly to be strong. The thing is I eventually realized that my strength had become my curse. It was my own strength that was sucking the life out of me. I had built up such a wall that people thought I could handle anything. I kept fighting when I should have been letting go. There I was repeating a vicious cycle because I felt like I couldn't let my guards down and be vulnerable. My strength kept me silent when people hurt me, and I began to internalize the pain. I had been conditioned to believe that I had to somehow hold it all together. One thing is for sure, strong people are rarely checked on. So, there are many strong people who suffer in silence. Strong people know how to wear those smiles just enough for you to think they are ok. Strength is truly a gift and a curse so there has to be a balance. Sharing my own experiences are a critical part of my own journey to wholeness and balance. As I reflected on how those things made me feel as a person, I realized I had to heal. I used to know her is a declaration of freedom from the traumas that we are rarely given the space to heal from. I charge you to use my stories to be your own savior, it is time to heal and grow.